Heart Stopping Moments

Friday was my appointment with an obstetrician, the first I'd had in 4 weeks. I decided to see a new practice after some serious thought over the last few months. I simply couldn't take being in the other office and seeing those doctors and nurses. The new OB was very personable and has also worked with Dr. H with a previous patient and had very positive things to say about her.

Whether I stick with that OB or another in the practice is yet to be determined, but I liked what I experienced from a personality standpoint.

The appointment itself had one heart stopping moment.

Literally.

The doctor had me lay back to listen to Dash's heartbeat with the doppler, which is pretty standard practice at this point.

The heartbeat thumpa-thumped at it's normal 140 bpm for a few seconds, then slowed . . . and slowed . . . and then stopped.

The doctor had me sit up immediately and listened again. We could hear her heartbeat immediately pick up speed, back to the 140 beats she started with. I was told that I'm no longer allowed on my back at all.

My breakfast had been salty and I may have been dehydrated.  However, it seems unlikely to me that minor dehydration should have led to cord compression that was that severe so quickly. I was in such shock that I didn't ask the doctor her opinion on what had happened.

I did have the mental clarity to remind the OB that if she's worried about that heart beat, she can call Dr. H and I'll be brought in quickly for an ultrasound to see what's going on. My specialist doesn't mess around with stuff like that!

I have spent my weekend chugging and sipping water at every  turn in the hopes of keeping myself well hydrated.

The difficult part is sleep. I have a habit of waking up on my back and it's quite clear I can't risk that because doing so can risk the life of my daughter.

I'm not sleeping very well anymore!

In the back of my mind, even in sleep, is an awareness of my position and it's preventing me from getting the solid sleep I'm used to, even in small chunks. I'm dreaming  a lot and able to remember them, which is another of my personal indicators that I'm not in a deep sleep through most of the night.

Then there are days like yesterday where Dash simply isn't very active and they scare me, too. I was so distracted trying to feel the tiniest wiggle during all 3 hours hours of church yesterday, after she'd had a very quiet night, reminding myself to remain calm and praying Dash would move so I could feel her.

"Just one good strong kick, please!"

She has a mind and schedule of her own, however, and my anxiety wasn't lifted until around 4pm, when I gave in and had a soda. The caffeine isn't good for hydration or circulation, but it did wake her up and so I don't regret it. She remained active for the next 4 hours and then calmed down for the night again.

Last night was better than the night before. As I'd wake to roll over, it only took a minute or two each time to get a small but distinct movement to let me know she was doing okay. And longer than a minute or two and I switched sides, unsure if her lack of movement was a cord compression issue or if she was just sleeping.

I'd rather switch sides and feel her move than risk a compression event.

My doppler has been out multiple times a day since Friday, too. That compression happened so fast. It was very scary for me!

The good news in all this is that I got my anti-Xa levels back from the test that was run last week. It came back at 0.76.  Once again in the perfect range and even better, not a decrease from 3 weeks before!!

I'm finally putting on weight, so I'll ask Dr. H to continue to let me get the test run since the medicine is weight based. She may give me a little grief like last time, but it's my arm that has to get poked and I'll feel better if the test is run.

In the meantime, I will Drink Drink Drink. . . water, that is!!